Today was a complete disaster! I wish I had the ability to speak like a normal person. In my structural analysis class, I made a complete idiot of myself. Nothing I say comes out right. When I think I'm complementing someone, they think I'm insulting them. When I think I'm making a valid point, it turns out to be irrelevant. I feel like that Edie Brickell song Circle of Friends when she sings "I quit, I give up, nothings good enough for anybody else." What is just as bad is the fact that I study different languages and I've noticed that I'm developing not one, not two, but three accents. I haven't pinpointed just what triggers any of them yet. It's so embarrassing. A great deal of it has to do with the fact that I speak Spanish with some of my friends and that seems to be the predominant one. I went shopping today and realized that I need help picking out shoes. I saw a few pairs that I wanted, but couldn't decide which to buy. They all had something I didn't like about them. I felt so anxious, like going on a run to get a fix. Sweaty palms, a slight case of butterflies, the surroundings become a great big blur... The only thing that makes my day on Saturdays is my Physics class. I've had so many questions for so many years and finally I'm getting some answers. Our professor kicks ass! Reminds me of Feynman, makes things that seem incredibly difficult to understand seem practical. However, I get too excited and want to ask so many questions, yet I don't want to miss a thing he says. So, I end up only asking a few. Another thing I love about this class is that I feel I'm five years old again, learning about new and strange things. No one laughed at me when I asked why in sci-fi movies people blow up when they go back in time and touch their other selves. Although, the answer was disappointing, I was so glad no one laughed at me. :) Speaking of Physics, I have two quizzes to complete...
posted by Lady Ursula at 6:44 PM